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by Gibby McCaleb - AccuScore Analyst
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F

The Arizona Cardinals Defense
There isn’t much to say here; Arizona got toasted at home by Vinny Testaverde, a 43 year old quarterback who was sitting on his sofa watching ‘Wheel of Fortune’ a mere five days prior to the game.  Just when you get lured into thinking the Cardinals will be different this year, they remind you that they are still the Cardinals, bravely snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

The St. Louis Rams
In my pick video last week, I suggested that the Rams would be better off if they didn’t even attempt to run a single offensive play against the Ravens defense but instead punted every time they got the ball.  Five interceptions later, I was right.  The Rams had a better chance of picking off the Ravens and returning it for a score than they had of actually executing anything on offense.

D

The Dallas Cowboys Offensive Coaches
Granted, they still probably would have lost the game but Dallas made so many mental and coaching mistakes in their much-hyped match-up against the Patriots culminating with an absolutely mind-numbing decision to kick a field goal when down by two touchdowns in the fourth quarter.  14 – 3 = 11.  Texas Instruments headquarters are right up the road.  They make calculators.

The Seattle Seahawks
Back to back losses for the Seahawks.  The first, a old fashioned whupping by the Pittsburgh Steelers and then getting spanked at home by the 0-4 New Orleans Saints.  Luckily for Holmgren’s crew, they get the Rams at home next week and then their bye the following week.

The Cincinnati Bengals
Just when you get lured into thinking the Bengals will be different this year, they remind you that they are still the Bengals, bravely snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.  With so many media-hyped offensive weapons like Carson Palmer, Chad Johnson, Rudi Johnson and TJ Housmanzadah, you’d think this team would be challenging the Colts and Patriots for total points scored.  Still, the Bengals are third in scoring. Third in the AFC North.  As odd as it would seem, the Houston Texans and Miami Dolphins have scored more points on offense this year, yet they do not have one single player with a national TV ad among them.

     

B

 

The New Orleans Saints
It is about time the Saints woke up and played some football.  Drew Brees and Reggie Bush both pitched solid performances Sunday night and they beat the Seattle Seahawks in Seattle.  I’m holding off before I officially pronounce the Saints as being back in business but with three out of the next four games against the Falcons, 49ers and Rams; the Saints picked a perfect time to get their offense rolling.

 

A+

Vinny Testaverde
Vinny got signed on Wednesday, started on Sunday and actually won in Arizona. He now holds the record for the oldest quarterback to start and win an NFL game.  Not only did he win the game but he failed to throw even one interception. Beyond the victory, the bizarre touchdown bomb and everything else, you have to marvel at how quickly he learned even a few of the plays in the playbook.  He didn’t make a single mistake, didn’t drop a snap or botch a handoff. In one word, amazing. Now if he can only last another five years, he’ll break George Blanda’s record for oldest person to play in an NFL game.  As an aside, Testaverde was actually contacted by the Cardinals first after Leinart went down but after the Panthers called, he picked Carolina to be closer to his family.  So did you get that?  43 year old Vinny not only started and won but he actually had his choice of two teams to sign with.  Once again, amazing.  At 42 years old, I’m in my prime…

 

Devin Hester
This guy just keeps getting it done.  At this point, it’s clearly not a surprise to anyone, fans and media alike but my God, you’d think opposing coaches would have figured out something by now.  And to add insult to injury, Hester is now catching passing touchdowns as well.  It’s a shame that all that excitement was for a losing cause this weekend.  One last note, we all need to remember that there are 10 other guys blocking for Hester who deserve some real credit too. Nice work guys.

 

Tony Gonzalez
My hats off to the man in Kansas City, Tony Gonzalez. He finally broke the record for most touchdowns by a tight end.  Gonzalez set the record in 11 years, whereas it took Shannon Sharpe 14 years to set the previous mark.  The best part?  Gonzalez isn’t even 1/100th as annoying as Shannon Sharpe.

 
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